Just for a moment I was back at school and felt that old familiar pain, and as I turned to make my way back home, the snow turned into rain

Well, that's Christmas done for another year. The Perfume adverts have finished and the Holiday ones have started. So now New Year approaches and reviews of the year gone by begin. So what kind of year has it been?
We have swapped a fairly dull PM for an even duller PM with a dull sidekick.England did not win the World Cup. Robbie rejoined Take That. Aung San Suu Kyi was released in Burmah after spending 15 of the last 21 years under house arrest. We had chaos in the summer with the Icelandic volcano ash cloud and further chaos in the winter when it snowed. Ayr United were relegated. 33 miners were rescued from mine in Chile after being trapped underground for 68 days. Wagner did not win The X Factor

I believe that covers the main global points of the year so I will now give you my own personal review of 2010

Best Moment of 2010: 11.28 AM 06/10/10 Young Ben arrives in the world and makes me a grandfather for the first time

Best Live Match attended in 2010.....Scotland 2 Spain 3. Although Scotland lost this one it was a pleasure to watch Spain and they did win me some money with their earlier World Cup win

Worst Live Match attended in 2010....Morton 2 Ayr 1 ...Ayr snatch defeat from the jaws of victory by losing two late goals and are relegated on the last day of the season. Happy Days

Best TV in 2010.....Mad Men......if you have not seen it, watch it. It is excellent

Worst TV moment of 2010....Storm singing Born To Run on The X Factor. There really should be a law against that

Favourite Album of 2010...The Suburbs by Arcade Fire

Best New Imaginary Girlfriend of 2010....Zooey Deschanel

Best Books read in 2010...Winter's Bone by Daniel Woodrell and Plainsong & Eventide by Kent Haruf

Best Sandwich of 2010.....Brie and Cranberry

Favourite Movie seen in 2010....The Hangover

Favourite Song of 2010...U Smile by Justin Bieber (just checking to see if any of you have actually read this far)

Well that's it for this year.Abbreviated Blog this week. People must have better ways to make use of their holidays than read this mince. Happy New Year to you all when it comes. I will be back in 2011

He knows if you've been bad or good so be good for goodness sake

Only six days to go and then as Noddy Holder famously said IT'S CHRISTMAS!. The tree is up , the presents are wrapped (except those that have not arrived as yet from Amazon ...that's the book/cd provider not that dwindling rainforest area in Brazil...Ben's pet pink-toed Tarantula arrived from there weeks ago) the turkey is playing happily in the back garden oblivious to his fate and the TV is awash with perfume adverts.

I have noticed in recent years how these have become more and more elaborate like Music Videos and now contain Hollywood stars. I believe there is now an Oscar category for Best Performance in a Perfume Advert. The nominees are Ryan Reynolds for Hugo Boss, James Franco for Gucci, Jude Law for Dior Homme, Naomi Watts for Angel by Thierry Mugler and Charlize Theron for Dior J'Adore. Charlize would definitely get my vote.

The Jude Law advert is set in Paris and c'est vraiment affreux. The very attractive French lady asks "How will I recognise you?" and Jude replies "Oh, Don't you worry about that. You'll know when I'm there" Yes, because he will be standing under the Eiffel Tower absolutely reeking of Dior Homme and speaking in a bad Cockney accent.

I almost appeared in a perfume ad myself. I made the final two for the Dolce and Gabbana advert but for some reason they went for the lad in the white trunks. I think he is slightly taller than I am.

It seems that nowadays almost anyone can put there name to a perfume....I mean Kerry Katona and Coleen Rooney...Really? Soon we will have Faithful by Tommy Sheridan, Cain And Abel by Ed Miliband, Sincere by David Cameron and Filled Nappy by Ben

But so-called Celebrities are everywhere on TV nowadays. I remember it was a novelty when people like Andre Previn or Angela Rippon appeared on Morecambe and Wise but this Christmas we could have 'Celebrity Present Wrapping', 'Celebrity Cracker Pulling' and 'Celebrity Tree Decorating'

I leave you this week with my Top 5 Favourite Festive Songs & Movies

Songs

1. Santa Claus is Coming to Town....Bruce Springsteen ......what else would it be
2. Merry Xmas Everybody....Slade...Noddy, 70s, Xmas..what's not to like
3. Last Christmas...Wham....last Christmas George gave her his heart but this year she is up the mountain with Andrew...it's enough to put George off women for life
4. Fairytale of New York...The Pogues....you cannot not (double negative?) sing along to this
5. I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus....Brenda Lee....particularly traumatic at the time but explained to me years later...my real dad is Santa Claus

Movies

1. Die Hard.....I guess I am just an old romantic at heart
2. Ben Hur....perhaps not an actual Christmas movie but it is on every Christmas and it does have an appearance by Jesus
3. Jack Frost....brings a tear to the eye, especially for Claire
4. Elf..Will Ferrell has given many outstanding performances but this may just be his finest (apart from Anchorman of course)
5. A Night at the Opera...The Marx Brothers....yes I know it's not a Christmas movie but it does include the immortal lines "That's what they call a Sanity Clause".."You can't fool me, there aint no Sanity Clause" and I had to fit that in somehow

Well, That's it. Merry Christmas everyone and I hope Santa is good to you all

the road is long with many a winding turn

Today (12/12/10) is the birthday of my youngest son, Ben's Uncle Dean or The Human Calcy as his Maths teacher once famously called him. He is earning a crust down in The Big Smoke so I won't see him today but he did make a special trip home last weekend for his brother Den's 30th.

We had a night out all together last Saturday at Sean's pub (we like to keep it in the family) and it was great to see such a large turnout. There were friends of all three of my sons there and it is testament to his character that so many people made the effort to show up. We have always had an open door policy in our house when it comes to friends visiting so I have known many of the boys there for nearly 20 years and shared in their highs and lows as well as those of my own family

There was a lot of hugging, a lot of laughing, a lot of emotion and even some kissing (that was Claire's fault) but mostly there was a lot of drink. Special mention must go to Cunns (pronounced Cunns) for his Rothesay reminiscences, to Hamish for his efforts with the sambuca and to Greg whose free-style dancing was the highlight of the evening

I like to think that my sons and I have a special relationship, perhaps circumstances made it that way, but the fact that they are still all close friends makes me very happy. They have a bond and now the arrival of young Ben has strengthened that bond. I believe life is about priorities and if your family is not your number one priority then what is the point in being here.

They are my legacy. As you get older you start to look back on your life and your achievements. I have no regrets (apart from not asking out Linda Bell in 1972).I am a lucky man. I have walked over The Golden Gate Bridge, I have crossed 110th Street, I have seen Scotland win at Wembley and I have eaten the worm at the bottom of a bottle of tequila (ok it may have been mezcal). I know that I have not created any miracle cure for a fatal disease but I also know that the world is a better place for having my sons in it. I realise that this is not unique and that many parents will feel this way which is as it should be.

I am not saying they are perfect and that I have agreed with all their choices in life (I still don't understand how any sons of mine could support *******) but all you can do is teach them right from wrong, point them in the appropriate direction and be there when they need you (and hope that at least one of them makes a good enough living to look after you in your old age)

Over recent years we have enjoyed many trips away together to places like Madrid, Barcelona, Albufeira, Porta Pollensa, Amsterdam, Sunderland (strangely they all seem to be connected to football) and I have been privileged to be in their company and listen to their banter and watch them in action
Claire and Young Ben are now a part of this elite club and will share in the rewards that membership brings. I was hoping Young Ben would be taking his grandpa to the World Cup in 2018 but Vladivostok may prove more challenging than Manchester.

Apologies if this week has been over self-indulgent but it is my son's birthday and he is miles from home. Happy Birthday Dean. Hope you have a good one!

Let me wrap myself around you, let me show you how I see

Apologies to all my avid readers for the lateness of my Blog this week. Yesterday,as with the majority of Scotland, I spent most of the day in my car going nowhere. This strange white stuff fell from the sky and brought the country to a standstill. Since authorities seem to believe our climate is twinned with Australia we were stunned by this weather.Never mind, by the weekend we will be back on the beaches with our barbies and our surf boards.

This week Young Ben and I decided to do our letters to Santa. Apparently you can now do this on-line but we went "old school" with parchment and quill pen. When we finished I suggested that perhaps 74 items was somewhat optimistic and we whittled that down to a more realistic number

1. Ocean Wonders Space Saver Swing
2. Winnie The Pooh/Tigger Magic Rattle
3. Mr Potato Head
4. Ayr United Hat and Scarf
5. Amazing Animals Train
6. Fisher Price My First Guitar

That was my list. Young Ben's is secret, Santa likes it that way. He did mention that I would struggle to fit in the Space Saver Swing, but we shall see.

I have already started my own collection of Fisher Price My Firsts for Ben which include My First Cocktail Shaker, My First Rolex, My First Large Hadron Collider, My First iPhone, My First Coupon and My First Bottle of Lucozade for the Morning After, but I have drawn the line at My First Kindle. Looking for Spot on a Kindle would just not be the same

I was looking at worldwide pre-Christmas traditions on-line this week and here are my favorite 5 (if these are incorrect, don't blame me, blame Wiki. Everyone else seems to be doing that at the moment anyway)

1. Greenland...They have a dish called kiviak. To make this special treat they take the flesh of an auk, wrap it in sealskin and place it under a rock until it decomposes. Mmm delicious, perhaps Ben's Dad should add that one to his Christmas menu at The Church On The Hill
2. Yugoslavia (is there still a Yugoslavia?)...
The second Sunday before Christmas, children sneak up on their mum and tie her feet to a chair. They yell, 'Mother's Day, Mother's Day, what will you pay to get away?' The mother then gives them each a gift. This repeats the next Sunday with the dad and he too gives them gifts.(not really sure how they give them gifts whilst tied to a chair)
3. Finland...The Christmas season begins on Christmas Eve where everyone gathers at 5:00pm at the cemetery to pay a visit to his or her deceased loved ones. The visitors place candles on the graves and a service takes place. (I have been to Finland--they are not the cheeriest of people)
4. Netherlands... On the 6th of December, Sinterklaas and his sidekick, Black Pete, arrive by steamer. They leave nuts and candy for the children who have been good. (I think I may have met Black Pete on my last trip to Amsterdam....I certainly met his sister)
5.France...... On the night of December 5th, children are visited by two Santas -- Pere Noel and Pere Fouettard. Pere Noel rewards the kids with gifts, but Pere Fouettard (Father Spanker) gives the bad children a spanking.(Ah those fun loving Frenchies--nothing like a good hiding to get you in the Festive mood)

Anyway, that's it for this week. Happy Santa List writing. See you on the beach Saturday. Throw another penguin on the Barbie.