After subjecting my brain to years and years of pop music I am attempting to harness my own super power. I am "sing the lyrics of a song and be transported through space and time to the events of that song guy". I admit it's not as catchy as Spiderman or Batman but I am working on it.
Unfortunately I have not yet perfected this super power and at present it is somewhat sporadic and I find myself a bit like The Time Traveller's Wife's Husband. One minute I can be minding my own business, singing to myself, when suddenly there I am working on a chain gang with my mate Sam. Now I know we have all worked on a chain gang at some time in our lives but, hey, I've done my time, let a man move on with his life
The other morning I was just looking out of my window at the rain dirty valley and suddenly --wallop--there was Brigadoon and some show-off climbing a ladder with a torch in his pocket and the wind at his heels and yes we have all seen your comet trail blazing trick before so just let it go
Then last week I was walkin' down the street, concentratin' on truckin' right but I wasn't singing 10CC, I was singing Don McLean "And I love Her So" and when I looked behind there was Hank Marvin and Bruce Welch following me (younger readers may have to look this one up)
As I say though I cannot plan an episode. No matter how many times I walk along the beach singing Bobby Goldsboro all I ever end up with is sand in my shoes. I guess Bobby did not have Prestwick Beach in mind when he wrote that song. Sometimes I get my Bobby Goldsboro lyrics mixed up and a massive tree suddenly appears before me. Yes Bobby, I can see how big it's grown
And no matter how many times I sing about kissing a girl and liking it the feelings do not appear to be reciprocal
But sometimes it just works like a charm. Who wouldn't want to be sailing up the west coast through villages and towns although I can live without the Raki and the Maynard Keynes (have you ever read Maynard Keynes?...Ricky Ross may be the only person from Dundee who has )
And how many times have you strolled through the crowd like Peter Lorre, contemplating a crime on a morning from a Bogart movie, in a country where they turn back time
Earlier this week I was in my house singing Richard Marx when a man with a badge came knocking and there was I surrounded by a thousand fingers suddenly pointed right at me. I swore I left her by the river, I swore I left her safe and sound but the neighbours still took a bit of convincing and I thought setting fire to the house was a bit over the top. Innocent until proven guilty people!
My heating broke down last week, but no matter how often I sing the song it would appear in fact that Bob the Builder cannot fix it and I will have to call out a heating engineer
Sometimes the song works without any magic. I was with Young Ben yesterday and I was singing "You Are The Sunshine Of My Life", when he gave me one of his little smiles. Who needs super powers when you have a smile like that
Notwithstanding, I will keep singing "Island In The Sun" and hope for the best
Unfortunately I have not yet perfected this super power and at present it is somewhat sporadic and I find myself a bit like The Time Traveller's Wife's Husband. One minute I can be minding my own business, singing to myself, when suddenly there I am working on a chain gang with my mate Sam. Now I know we have all worked on a chain gang at some time in our lives but, hey, I've done my time, let a man move on with his life
The other morning I was just looking out of my window at the rain dirty valley and suddenly --wallop--there was Brigadoon and some show-off climbing a ladder with a torch in his pocket and the wind at his heels and yes we have all seen your comet trail blazing trick before so just let it go
Then last week I was walkin' down the street, concentratin' on truckin' right but I wasn't singing 10CC, I was singing Don McLean "And I love Her So" and when I looked behind there was Hank Marvin and Bruce Welch following me (younger readers may have to look this one up)
As I say though I cannot plan an episode. No matter how many times I walk along the beach singing Bobby Goldsboro all I ever end up with is sand in my shoes. I guess Bobby did not have Prestwick Beach in mind when he wrote that song. Sometimes I get my Bobby Goldsboro lyrics mixed up and a massive tree suddenly appears before me. Yes Bobby, I can see how big it's grown
And no matter how many times I sing about kissing a girl and liking it the feelings do not appear to be reciprocal
But sometimes it just works like a charm. Who wouldn't want to be sailing up the west coast through villages and towns although I can live without the Raki and the Maynard Keynes (have you ever read Maynard Keynes?...Ricky Ross may be the only person from Dundee who has )
And how many times have you strolled through the crowd like Peter Lorre, contemplating a crime on a morning from a Bogart movie, in a country where they turn back time
Earlier this week I was in my house singing Richard Marx when a man with a badge came knocking and there was I surrounded by a thousand fingers suddenly pointed right at me. I swore I left her by the river, I swore I left her safe and sound but the neighbours still took a bit of convincing and I thought setting fire to the house was a bit over the top. Innocent until proven guilty people!
My heating broke down last week, but no matter how often I sing the song it would appear in fact that Bob the Builder cannot fix it and I will have to call out a heating engineer
Sometimes the song works without any magic. I was with Young Ben yesterday and I was singing "You Are The Sunshine Of My Life", when he gave me one of his little smiles. Who needs super powers when you have a smile like that
Notwithstanding, I will keep singing "Island In The Sun" and hope for the best
wow, some pretty obscure references in there, m'lud, and if you quote Year of the Cat just one more time I will really really have to set Vidock on you.
ReplyDeleteIs that Harry's Island or Weezer's?
ReplyDelete